"once you choose hope, anything is possible"

Monday, December 10, 2012

growing up

It's hard to believe that I have almost completed yet another semester of college, but here I am studying for my last few finals and starting to pack my suitcase to go home for Christmas. To say these last few months have flown by is an understatement, I feel like we were all just studying for midterms and I certainly don't feel like we've been here long enough to be taking finals already. Nevertheless, here we are and in my efforts to procrastinate studying just a little longer, I have spent a significant amount of time thinking about how much I have grown up, and panicking because of it.

My older sister, best friend, and hero these past couple years called me on Friday radiating happiness because she had finished her very last class as an undergraduate. Don't get me wrong, I am so happy for her, but I can't imagine being here without her. Kaitie and I have always been close because of our age, and I can't actually seem to wrap my head around the fact that next semester she will be a "real person" teaching a class full of 1st graders and starting a life separate from mine. We have always done everything together: danced together, gone out together, gone to school together. I know I still have one more semester with her in Milwaukee, but I don't really think going out for pizza together on Thursday nights is really going to fit into her big girl teaching schedule. 

I just want a remote control so I can pause life, just for a little bit. I don't think I'm ready to grow up, and I am certainly not ready for Kaitie and the rest of my sisters to grow up. As we were all together in Chicago for Thanksgiving, it really got me thinking about how different our lives have become. Its hard to imagine that the 6 troublemakers who used to tear down State Street in search for Santa at Marshall Fields have become future lawyers, teachers, and moms. Our happy little family of 8 has grown to 10 and is now spread across 4 different states and while I am more blessed and happy than ever, I am terrified about what is to come as we all continue to grow up. 

While I am still waiting on the invention of the remote control for life, I can't wait to get back to Texas and spend my break laughing around the table with my sisters and playing with my niece and nephew. I am so thankful that we have yet another holiday in which we are all together, even though I know these times together are winding down. Even better this year, in order to celebrate my Grandma's birthday our entire extended family will be joining us the weekend after Christmas. Just like old times, I can't wait till all the Hau's are reunited for the holidays once again :)